Find Inspiration With Four Simple Thoughts

This post is about inspiration and is about you. Just as you are right now.

It won’t suggest you become someone different, or tell you that you have to gain anything of material significance.

It won’t because your most valuable gifts are already within you.

And once they are uncovered everything in your life will flow more smoothly. When you change your inner world, the outer world will change around you.

There is no need for me to tell anyone that the road of life is never easy. All too frequently we encounter detours, speed bumps, and U-turns.

Instead of being negatives, I like to think of these challenges as necessary to appreciate the full scope that life has to offer. Without experiencing the lows would we truly appreciate the highs?

“Once I decide to do something, I can’t have people telling me I can’t. If there’s a roadblock, you jump over it, walk around it, crawl under it.” – Kitty Kelley

Sometimes it is too easy to only focus on the challenges. They occupy our attention and become all we can see.

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In the past, I would lose sight of goals because I could not see past the obstacles in the way. I then began to fixate on the obstacle instead of the goal.

I was quickly and continually derailed from achieving my goals.

Goal setting and the subsequent derailment became sources of frustration for me. I had to find a way of breaking the cycle.

I had to find sources of strength, inspiration, and perseverance to keep my focus on the outcomes I wanted.

In this post, I offer four simple thoughts that will help you find the treasures that are within you to uncover your greatness.

Inspiration: Your greatest love affair should be you

That person is you

Your greatest love affair should be with yourself. And you need to view your relationship with yourself as your most important relationship.

How often do you see people giving their love freely to others, but they don’t provide themselves with respect let alone love.

Many of us are happy to speak up and defend people we care about but let that critical inner voice in our head continue unchecked.

“Our first and last love is self-love.” – Christian Nestell Bovee

Will you indulge me and allow me to tell you a story? I am working with a wonderfully giving single mother.

She does everything she can to support her children, emotionally, financially and psychologically. All the things that you would say a good parent should do.

But if you listen carefully to what she says you will note that her conversation is plastered with self-deprecating comments. She is continually putting herself down.

The critical inner voice

After seven minutes of chatting, I paused the conversation. I read out the first 15 negative and scathing comments that she made about herself that I had listed. After fifteen, I stopped writing them down.

“Would you tell anyone those comments over the course of an entire day?” I asked.

“Never. I couldn’t be that cruel.”

Yet she was that cruel to herself. And not over twenty-four hours but seven minutes.

Before we started working together, she had no idea that she could control her inner voice. And her inner voice is toxically damaging.

We are working together to build her relationship with herself. If want to improve your relationship with yourself Self-Esteem Develop More Of It is a good starting point.

Is it time that you built your relationship with yourself? To train that inner voice to compliment you and to show appreciation to yourself?

You make it easier for others to love you when you love yourself. It is never too late to start to love yourself.

Inspiration: If you are in a hole stop digging

We can all fall into a rut. The key is when you find yourself at a low point, not to dig the rut even deeper by beating yourself up. Many people fall into a hole and then dig it deeper without even realising it.

Sometimes, giving up is perhaps the most natural thing you can do. Whatever we repeat often enough becomes a habit. If you give up then giving up becomes a habit.

“Obstacles don’t have to stop you. If you run into a wall, don’t turn around and give up. Figure out how to climb it, go through it, or work around it.” – Michael Jordan

The problem is giving up becomes our default solution. Our automatic response to pretty much everything.

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Do you want to have giving up as your default option?

To get out of that rut, we must first accept our current position. Yes, we are in a hole.

When we recognise the behaviours and decisions that lead to us falling in, we will be capable of avoiding similar pitfalls in the future.

Inspiration: Show up even when you don’t feel like it

Some days, life gets the best of us. There is no helping it. These occasions will continue to test our resolve.

I remember the Woody Allen quote, “Showing up is 80% of life. Sometimes it’s easier to hide at home in bed. I’ve done both.”

Imagine it is Monday morning at 6:00am, and you are on your way to work. Nobody told you that you needed to be there that early.

If we were being honest, we would all prefer to be in bed right now. It’s a cold morning and just staying curled up under a warm duvet actually sounds really nice right now.

But you don’t want to let yourself do that.

Why? Because you have got to show up.

All the adversity I’ve had in my life, all my troubles and obstacles, have strengthened me… You may not realize it when it happens, but a kick in the teeth may be the best thing in the world for you.” – Walt Disney

Several years ago, a friend used the analogy of life being like a photo album. Your task is at the end of each day, to put a photograph summarising that day into your album.

What would each picture look like? Would yesterday be any different than today? Or would tomorrow be different from any day next week?

Most of us settle into routines and ruts in life that allow us to take the path of least resistance. It’s easier that way.

It is easier to stay in bed, to not to do the work. It’s easier just to hope and wish it all works out.

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But doing so will only reproduce the same picture of what your life has already given you.

Let’s be honest… most things worth doing in life are never easy. If it were easy, everyone would do it.

Inspiration: A stumble does not have to be the end of the journey

How hard we fall is not important, the critical part is continually picking ourselves up. The challenges and obstacles we face in life are momentary occurrences in an enduring adventure.

It made me think about people I’ve known who have stumbled and stayed there. Not to mention the times I’ve stumbled and wanted to stay there…

“For every failure, there’s an alternative course of action. You just have to find it. When you come to a roadblock, take a detour.” – Mary Kay Ash

The road of life can be long and challenging. And the path may twist and turn. There will be potholes and obstacles in the way. Some days it may seem more comfortable to sit down and make camp where you stumbled. Don’t do it! Don’t!

Keep your goal in focus and keep moving forward until you get there!

We will slip, trip and stumble. And making mistakes is an essential part of learning how best to handle recurring situations. With experience, we learn to recognise these potholes in advance and deal with them before they cause us to stumble.

How will you use these four simple thoughts to find inspiration that will help you push through and not give up. Developing perseverance is an integral part of living an outstanding life, click HERE to find out more.

Make A Great First Impression Every Time

Have you seen someone and got that first impression that they were not friendly? Or have you ever met someone that was warm and inviting and you became friends with them immediately?

You judge a person the same way you judge a book, by its cover. Our parents and teachers told us not to, but it is what we do.

It is how we evolved. We needed to know who was trustworthy and who we needed to avoid.

The adage that you ‘only get one chance to make a first impression’ holds true now as it did generations ago. That one chance lasts less than ten seconds, and some theorise that first impression is only two seconds.

“It’s easy to impress me. I don’t need a fancy party to be happy. Just good friends, good food, and good laughs. I’m happy.” – Maria Sharapova

Like it or not, human beings make snap judgments about people they meet, even if it is for the first time. People start forming a picture of you in those opening moments.

Here I will be covering seven tricks to create a great first impression whether you are on a first date, job interview or work reception.

1. Confident body language

Let’s start with a statistic. 70% of communication is transmitted non-verbally, according to the University of Pennsylvania. That is body language. And only 23% is voice tone and inflexion, and 7% being your spoken words.

Earlier studies by Mehrabian suggested that 55% of communication is transmitted via body language.

If you are are meeting someone for the first time, you want to be comfortable with confident body language so you will need to practice it first to make the right first impression.

Numerous studies suggest that your body language not only influences your physiology but also the nature of the people around you.

If you have your arms crossed across your chest and your feet tapping nervously, you will be seen as timid and closed off.

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Effective body language goes beyond merely standing up straight and having a firm handshake – although those two things are fundamental. If you are are meeting someone for the first time, do it with an open posture.

That means arms are uncrossed with open hands to show that nothing is being kept hidden. Legs are parallel and not crossed. They may even be stretched apart.

The head will be upright or may be looking around. Eye contact is likely to be relaxed and prolonged.

Lean in closer to the person you are talking with to show you’re engaged in the conversation and actively listening. If you are usually expressive with your hand gestures to communicate, don’t hold back.

What behaviours should you avoid to make a good first impression? Refrain from blinking excessively, tapping, touching your face too often, placing objects in front of you, and standing or sitting too close to others.

“For me it’s always about first impressions. I trust my instincts.” – David Brett-Williams

Nonverbal cues make a compelling impact on the other person’s subconscious. So it is always beneficial to be aware of your posture and body language in general, but particularly when delivering a sales pitches or being interviewed.

Stand confidently, make eye contact, and when in doubt, take cues from the other person’s body language.

2. Smile

When making an initial judgement about someone, their facial expression is typically the first aspect that gets noticed. So it’s essential to appear both happy and engaged.

Your facial expressions influence people’s impression about whether or not you’re a “trustworthy” person.

These judgements are done instantly, after only 34 milliseconds of looking at your face. That according to research from Princeton University.

Want to be judged as trustworthy? Then, you need to smile. But if you have an angry-looking face it gets judged as untrustworthy.

Psychologist James McConnell, put it simply, “People who smile tend to manage and sell more effectively and raise happier children.” You can find other gems in his book Understanding Human Behavior.

3. Be on time

If you want to make a positive first impression, demonstrate that you’re respectful of the other people’s time by being on time. This applies to many situations. Whether that is a job interview, business appointment, coffee date or lecture.

Surveys frequently show that a lack of punctuality and being kept waiting nearly always feature in the top five of lists of gripes from potential employers.

If you tend to be late, then get up earlier to allow time to get ready. Or if you think travel may cause a delay, allow more time than you need to get there. If you are early, you can always use the extra time to prepare.

The take-home message is that being on time or early shows you are taking the other person seriously.

4. Use your tone

This is one you need practice beforehand. Unfortunately, a high-pitched voice is interpreted as nerves or childishness.

It has been shown that people perceive those who use a rising inflexion at the end of their sentences as less knowledgeable, no matter what they are saying.

Not sure if you’re guilty of this? Try recording yourself reading aloud. Whenever I do this, I am always stunned by the difference between what I think I sound like and what I actually do.

Having a higher pitched voice is beautiful. And if you learn to use it effectively, it can be a fantastic tool as long as you use it confidently.

Being Canadian, I have a tendency to talk quickly. But you might say I jabber! According to a study from Brigham Young University faster speakers are considered to be more confident.

Whatever speed you talk at, be sure to avoid using filler words. Typical filler words are “um,” “ah,” “like,” and other similar phrases. It shows hesitation and suggests nervousness.

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If you learn and use these four little magic words: “And how about you?”

It invites the other person to tell you about themselves and to go in the direction they’re most excited to go in. After all, most people are happy to talk about themselves.

5. Eye contact

Eye contact is an integral part of every successful conversation. When approaching someone for the first time, look them directly in the eye as you meet them. Avoid looking at the ground or past the person.

You don’t want to appear as too intimidating or creepy when you are staring at someone. But you don’t want to seem meek or shy with no eye contact at all.

As the conversation develops, to maintain the right level of eye contact without staring try to keep eye contact for 50% of the time while speaking and 70% of the time while listening.

“I love almost everything about my work except conferences. I am too shy in front of an audience. But I love signings and having eye contact with a reader who already knows my soul.” – Paulo Coelho

If you make eye contact with someone say at the gym and you do it more than three times. Do not do it a fourth time without striking up a conversation or you will be the weird person at the gym or the office or wherever this is.

Also, if you are observing someone speaking or giving a lecture, go with the 70/30 rule. Look at the person for 70% of the time and look away for the remaining 30% of the time.

This is not an exact science, but having a guideline will help tremendously.

6. Appearance matters with a first impression

Appearances matter even more now in the days of social media. The images of the beautiful, the rich and the famous that we get bombarded with influence our definition of what is attractive.

It is important to dress to impress all the time. You can’t predict when you will meet somebody new and find yourself in the middle of a meaningful conversation.

More importantly, taking pride in your appearance helps you feel as confident as you should be at any given point in the day.

Back when I was a teenager, I had a friend who applied for a job at a grocery store. Kenny went for the interview wearing a button down shirt, cotton chino trousers and some polished leather loafers.

Now you can say that it is normal to look smarter because it was for an interview. However, that wasn’t unusual for Kenny. That was his look. Back then it was called preppy.

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But he wears the same attire whenever he is working. Whether he was stocking shelves, sweeping the back room or bagging groceries.

In fact, during his interview, walking around the store with the manager he had a temporary name badge. Dressed like that and chatting to the manager the other staff thought he was from head office.

The amount of respect he got from the other staff and customers was unreal. All down to the clothes making the person.

The thing was, he hadn’t turned eighteen yet!

7. Know what you are getting into

You wouldn’t wear a t-shirt to a meeting, and you wouldn’t wear a suit to a friends’ house to hang out. Always do your research. Figure out who’s going to be there and what the theme of the event will be.

That helps you prepare for potential conversation starters and dress for the occasion.

If your meeting is planned, you have plenty of opportunities to know lots about the business and/or person that you’re meeting with before you arrive.

Google provides an incredible insight into the company, their competition, their primary products, and any other relevant information before you even set foot in the building.

You may find How Badly Do You Want To Turn Your Dreams Into Reality an asset too.

Nowadays, LinkedIn is also an excellent place to check out who you’re meeting with and learn more about them as is the Charlie App.

This app uncovers information about the person you’re meeting with and sends you a summary with all the details.

Hope you found this post interesting, but these seven tricks will only be useful if you use them.

Creating a great first impression whether you are on a first date, job interview or work reception, will increase your likelihood of living an OUTSTANDING life. Time to get out in the world and make it happen.