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Home / 2019 / October

October 2019

Get Out And Stay Out Of The Weeds

Most successful people spend a lot of time in the weeds.

So how is it that we vision something more significant for ourselves than where we are at this moment?

The very first thing is to get out of the weeds.

Being in the weeds has to do with a golf ball landing in the “rough”.

The rough is the long grass off the fairway, and this long grass makes it hard to play your ball as you run the risk of falling behind. 

Getting in the weeds is a golf metaphor for losing control and being overwhelmed.

The more you have going on then, the busier you are, and the more time you can spend in the weeds.

To see something more significant for yourself, the critical step is to get out and stay out of the weeds.

weeds

Click the image to download the full infographic

Are you stuck in the weeds?  

Do you find yourself working incredibly hard, while at the same time feel like you are not getting much done? 

When your day ends, do you find yourself saying, “I didn’t get to what I wanted/needed to do today, but there is always tomorrow.” 

And then without surprise, you utter the very same words the next day? And the day after that too?

Don’t you feel like this person? I know I do.

You wake up, brush your teeth, make a cup of tea, feed the kids, pack the lunches, get them to school, get to work, text your friends, get coffee, feign interest, answer emails, update Facebook, avoid the meeting, make a few calls, look busy, crunch some numbers, update Facebook, get in the car, collect the kids from after-school club, feed the dog, check email, update Facebook, kiss your partner, climb into bed, fool around.

Are you kidding? 

I’m exhausted! 

Just turn off the lights.

I’m exhausted.

I’m too busy. How can I ever see something more significant for my life, I have kids to take care of and when I have a business to run when?

You have to gain control of your life, you need to get out of the weeds.

stuck in the weeds

We are all meant to live a life of greater meaning and purpose.

It may seem as though there is no way out of the weeds. And sometimes it truly is unavoidable. 

However, in most cases, this condition is not only self-imposed but self-perpetuated.

“That is crazy!” You might say. 

“You think I am choosing this?”

Yes, you may be choosing this, maybe not consciously, perhaps not intentionally.

I won’t apologise for being blunt. I am on a mission to help you figure out what you want to do with your life and to get it done.

A life of purpose beckons to us each day.

When we answer that call, we feel invigorated, energised, and deeply gratified.

And when we procrastinate and resist, we are overwhelmed, tired and frustrated.

 

Stuck in the weeds.

We don’t always realise when we stray off course until we find ourselves stuck in the weeds, becoming stagnant and increasingly irritated with our lives and ourselves.

This can happen in our professional or personal life when a project or endeavour takes us past our comfort zone and into procrastination. 

It can happen in critical conversations when we skirt around the real issues and stay mired in trying to save face or placing blame.

Or it can happen in relationships when we resist taking things to a deeper level and play it safe instead. 

And it happens in our lives when we trade our dreams and visions for doing what gets us by.

And then we go through the motions of staying busy instead of doing what we are really meant to do.

The problem is about RESISTANCE.

 

Resistance occurs when we face something that we fear will lead to pain or discomfort.

It has us focusing on all the things that could go wrong rather than all that we have to gain by moving forward. 

Resistance conjures up a multitude of negative emotions.

Embarrassment, betrayal, inadequacy, defeat, fear, humiliation, abandonment.

You name it, and these negative emotions have us engaging in anything we can to avoid experiencing them.

Resistance intends to have us play it safe. Planning, controlling, preparing, and orchestrating.

Resistance urges us to cling to the familiar, even if the familiar is unpleasant. 

It leads us to control our emotions rather than merely feeling and experiencing them. 

Here are five steps to get out and stay out of the weeds.

These steps will overcome the resistance that stops you from living the life you were meant to live.

 

(1) Take responsibility. 

When we are in the weeds, it is usually the result of an earlier decision we made to stay in our comfort zone. 

Sometimes, these decisions could have been made in default, like the kind of choice we make when we choose not to make a decision.

When we make the decision to play small, then we get distracted by anything that will keep us there. 

We blame the distractions for taking us off course, but the reality is that they are the outcomes of what we have decided to focus our attention on. Often these decisions are made at an unconscious level.

No one else is responsible but you.

Taking responsibility is vital because, without it, we relegate ourselves to being a victim and convince ourselves that we are immobilised and powerless. 

When we see beyond this self-imposed illusion, we recognise that we always have the opportunity and ability to reselect.

weeds stuck

(2) Reselect.  

Envision the state you would like to be in at any given moment. 

Get your head out of the weeds and look at the horizon.

What do you really want for yourself? 

What do you want to create? 

What do you want to feel? 

What do you want to experience? 

This might be a matter of remembering the goals you set for the last time you paused long enough to focus on them. Perhaps it is creating or revisiting or your vision for your personal and professional life.

It could be identifying what you would like to be experiencing in this moment.

Whatever it is, you need to make it real for yourself.

Fully step into it.

Embrace it.

Feel it.

Flesh it out.

Become it.  

Take a moment, and remember the last time you felt whatever it is you want to experience and relive it once again. I can’t stress this enough, it really helps. 

That means seeing what you saw, hearing what you heard, tasting what you tasted and feeling what you felt. 

Talking it over with people who believe in you and inspire you and can help you to reconnect with what you genuinely want and breathe new life into it. 

Write it down and move deeper and deeper into it. Revisit what you wrote and re-read it and add more as it comes to you.

 

(3) Commit to yourself.  

There is a massive difference between wishing and committing. 

You can hope for a better life. You can want a great relationship and a bright future.

Or you may be interested in learning to do something different, trying something new, creating something exciting and fun. 

All this is great, and useless for keeping you out of the weeds, that is, until you commit, until you make that empowering decision.

Committing is making a decision to live the life you want to live.

The life you have imagined. 

It is about expressing and embracing all that you are without allowing anything to get in your way.

It is not about being anything that you are not.

Scottish mountaineer and writer William Hutchinson Murray wrote, “Until one is committed, there is hesitancy, the chance to draw back, always ineffectiveness“.

Concerning all acts of initiative and creation, there is one elementary truth, the ignorance of which kills countless ideas and splendid plans: that the moment one definitely commits oneself, then Providence moves too. 

All sorts of things occur to help one that would never otherwise have occurred.

A whole stream of events issues from the decision, raising in one’s favour all manner of unforeseen incidents and meetings and material assistance, which no man could have dreamt would have come his way. 

I have learned a deep respect for one of Goethe’s couplets:

“Whatever you can do, or dream you can, begin it.

Boldness has genius, power, and magic in it!” 

To commit to yourself means dealing with challenges, facing fears, accepting love, embracing diversity, and being comfortable to feel all emotions.

It means confronting many things that we might have run away from for a long time.

This is a willingness to step up and commit fully to what you want to do with your life.

You will be afraid of the emotions as they come up, but remember all it is, is an emotion. As human beings, we are meant to feel, it’s not a normal process for us not to feel emotion.

 

(4) Let go.  

We are brought up with the misconception that to get anything done, we need to get out there, be bold, and make things happen. 

Consequently, we spend a lot of time pounding square pegs into round holes and planning our next steps by reacting to things in our past. 

Uncertainty makes us uncomfortable, and we live a big chunk of our lives mitigating uncertainty by controlling everything in our power. 

But the future is by definition, uncertain. 

And our attempts to maintain control keep us stuck in the familiar, resistant to moving beyond the expanse of what we think we know.

The real power lies in admitting that we do not have all the answers and are ready and willing to learn.

We begin listening to new information and asking more critical questions.

Throughout the history of time, this is what the most celebrated artists, inventors, musicians, scientists, and geniuses in all fields have done. It requires that we tune in to a new way of knowing, one that goes beyond the need to figure everything out.

When we balance our logic with intuition and take one step at a time, we learn to feel our way to where we want to go.

And that is so much better than having to figure everything out in advance.

(5) Trust.  

The resistance we experience when we embark upon something new and extraordinary is our fear of the unknown. 

Our resistance would have us conjure up a show stopper as the worst-case scenario.

And this stops us when we believe we wouldn’t be able to handle it. 

A leader’s job is to instil confidence in others.

To have your people believe that they all have what it takes to rise up to any challenge they may be faced with.

To believe that they can overcome any obstacle in our path. 

There is a simple law that needs to be applied here, we need to do this for ourselves before we can do it for others. 

Being willing to let ourselves flow with the current requires trust in something bigger than ourselves, something that is working for our highest good. 

 

It requires faith

Moreover, it requires faith in ourselves and our ability to persevere, to adapt and to thrive in any environment we find ourselves placed in.

To find this trust and faith, we can reflect on the events of our lives that have led us to the very point where we are today.

Regardless of the fear we may have experienced, the peril we faced, and the uncertainty we had to navigate through, we have arrived at the point we are now. 

The sum of all of our experiences, whether pleasant or otherwise, has prepared us perfectly for whatever lies ahead of us.

No doubt we will find ourselves in the weeds from time to time.

There is no shame in being in the weeds, in fact, you are free to stay there as long as you wish. 

But when it dawns on you that living that way is no longer enough, and it will, you have the ability and the power to recommit, trust and let yourself flow with the current of adventure in your life.

A current that has the power to bring us to the realisation of all our greatest dreams and visions.

If this wasn’t enough to yank you out of the weeds or you would like more actionable steps to stay out of the weeds, then enrol in the free webinar, 5 Ways To Perform At Your Best.weeds CTA

  • 28 October, 2019
  • Personal Development
  • More

Make Creativity Your Superpower

This post includes nine kick-ass tips to make creativity your superpower and three actionable steps you can take right away to maximise your creativity.

Creativity isn’t just for artists. No matter where you are in life, or what you do, creativity comes in handy.

Creatively thinking of solutions to your problems is something we need to do every day.

Take a moment to think about it.

Is there anything in your life right now that could use a creative solution? I am willing to bet there is.

The good news is, all of us can become more creative in our lives by using the following tips:

 

1. Stop, collaborate …and listen? 

One of the best ways to get your creative juices flowing is to reach out to a colleague or friend.

Working with someone else adds an entirely new perspective to the task at hand. 

They may have an idea you hadn’t thought of, and that idea may spur on your great idea.

Collaborating with someone you respect is a great way to find a creative solution to a problem. 

 

2. Just do nothing

Stop slamming your head into the wall, trying to be creative.

If you find yourself struggling to think outside of the box, then move on to something else. 

Chances are it won’t be long until you are hit with a creative spark.

Often, when we actively stop thinking about something, our mind disengages enough to think creatively. 

creativity

3. Take a stroll

This is related to the ‘Just Do Nothing’ point. If you want to disengage your mind, go for a walk.

Taking a leisurely walk in nature is akin to entering a meditative state. 

Many famous ‘creatives’ used mid-day walks to break up the doldrums of the day, and at the same time, inspire some creativity. 

 

4. Change your surroundings

If you consistently struggle with creativity, then maybe there is something in your environment holding you back.

Try to mix things up in the office, or at home, by rearranging the furniture or reorganising your desk. 

If distractions surround you, do your best to limit those as well. 

 

5. Track your ideas

Make some effort to track your ideas.

You never know where inspiration might strike, so be prepared to jot something down when you have your next great idea. 

You can go old school and carry around an actual notebook if you want.

Even more convenient, use a note-taking app on your phone. 

This way, you can also dictate your ideas on the go. 

 

6. Work on your confidence

Do you know what kills creativity the most? Telling yourself that you aren’t creative. 

If you don’t have a stable level of self-esteem, then it will be nearly impossible for you to be creative.

You will shut down all of your ideas before you even try them. 

If you have a severe lack of self-belief, then this must be tackled before you can become more creative. 

 

7. Make some time (schedule it in)

You have to work creativity like it’s a muscle.

You can’t just hope to drum up creativity out of nowhere if you never put in the work. 

Make sure you do something creative as often as possible.

You should schedule a creative time to ensure you do it. 

creative

8. Forget perfection

Perfectionism is your inner voice telling you nothing you do is good enough.

This type of thinking will drain all the creativity you can muster. 

Perfectionism will ensure you take fewer creative risks, and it will turn your “great ideas” into “not good enough”.

You will be so worried about getting everything just right that it will sap your spontaneity, fun and creative energy. 

 

9. Try new things 

When you are trying (or learning) new things, you consistently spark your creativity.

Trying new pursuits will challenge your mind in new and unique ways. 

These new challenges will force you to think and act creatively. 

Commit to trying something new each and every week.

You will be surprised how much more creative you feel.

 

Action Step 1: Create a creativity journal. 

You can buy a notebook if you want, or use an app like Evernote on your phone.

Whenever inspiration strikes and you have a creative idea, be prepared to jot it down.

 

Action Step 2: Schedule some creativity into your week. 

Take a look at the next few weeks and find something creative to do in each of them. Schedule these into your calendar, so you don’t forget. 

 

Action Step 3: Just one new hobby or pursuit and get involved. 

You don’t have to jump in the deep end at first, go to Amazon or your local library and get a book about a topic you are interested in.

When you combine these nine kick-ass tips and three action steps you will maximise your creativity and make creativity, your new superpower.

creativity superpower

 

Related Articles:


How To Build Resilience, Your Competitive Advantage


A Strategy To Stop Overthinking


Build the Courage to Achieve Anything


 

  • 21 October, 2019
  • Personal Development
  • More

A Strategy To Stop Overthinking

Overthinking every decision you make is a detrimental habit to fall into. And we can all be guilty of it.

Uncertainty drives us to overthink our decisions.

Gathering more information and considering every potential outcome might delude you into thinking you’re advancing towards a goal when you really are just wasting your time.

Our subconscious drives 95% of our decisions. This, according to the Harvard Business School professor Gerald Zaltman, who studied consumer buying patterns.

Time to stop overthinking

How you feel about the decision dictates your progress. If you feel uncertain about choosing, then you will just keep thinking about.

The problem is that nothing starts until you do. Nothing starts until you make a decision.

If you want to stop overthinking, then you need to take control.

Despite what you might tell yourself, you are always ready to start. So you start and make a wrong decision?

You can adjust.

You don’t need to have all the answers just get started and then figure it out as you go along. Consider one of my business idols, Richard Branson.

He was not a pilot and had never flown a plane, and he really didn’t know anything about the engineering aspect or how to keep aircraft in the air, but he started an airline regardless.

How? You might ask

It’s simple, he started his business and figured it out along the way.

And here we are, over £2 billion in revenue and over 20 years later and Virgin are leading the world in commercial spaceflight.

As a side note, Branson sold Virgin America for $2.6 billion.

If you overthink decisions, try this strategy. It takes two minutes maximum and will help you break your analysis paralysis.

Ask yourself, “What would my idol do?”

Early in my business career, as I was trying to make my mark, I was always uncertain.

Through my experience in NLP (Neuro-Linguistic Programming), I devised this simple strategy to help me move past my feelings of self-doubt.

I picked an idol, someone I admired, and thought about what they would do in my situation.

Initially, I would choose between Jack Welch of General Electric, Ray Kroc of McDonald’s, and Sam Walton of Walmart.

When faced with a choice and I could feel the self-doubt begin to creep in, I asked, “What would Jack Welch do?” as a way to help me make decisions based on what I wanted to accomplish and not how I felt.

Today, I have different idols. They are Oprah Winfrey, Richard Branson, and Warren Buffet.

Consider why Oprah might be a great idol to ask.

I want to build a business and media platform similar to hers, write magazine articles and build a mentoring company. So now I ask myself, “What would Oprah do?”

Cognitive Restructuring

Asking yourself what would my idol do is a form of cognitive restructuring.

By using this question as a pattern interrupt, you stop your thoughts and interrupt your emotions, and this lets you focus your mind.

All sounds easy, right? There is a hard part. You need to do it.

What would my idol do? No uncertainty, No reconsidering, No thinking. Just push yourself.

Take it on trust that you can figure it out from there.

Have you got your idol or idols in mind yet?

Another tip that I was told is when in doubt, flip a coin.

No, we are not leaving decisions to chance. When you ask, what would my idol do? It relies on logic.

Flipping a coin taps into your emotions and your deeper desires.

If you have to decide between two choices, label one Choice A (heads) and Choice B (tails).

As the coin is in the air be mindful of your thoughts. You will secretly want one side of the coin over the other.

And when you tune into which side you are secretly hoping for that will tell you what you truly want.

Which strategy will you use to stop overthinking?

 

  • 14 October, 2019
  • Personal Development
  • More

Build the courage to achieve anything

There is a secret weapon that will help you live an outstanding life every single day, and that is courage.

Because you are reading this, you are someone who demands more from themselves.

You are always looking for ways to increase your happiness, health and productivity. And there are a ton of
time management skills and life hacks that can help you.

In this post, I am going to show you how to become the most courageous version of yourself.

If we look at something we are all familiar with, it will help you understand how you can build courage. How about those feelings in your body when you get back into the gym after a prolonged
break?

No one doubts that getting back into shape is hard, we all know how hard it is. It seems like it takes years to get in shape and only days to lose it.

The simple act of putting on your workout gear seems a significant accomplishment. As you put your gear on and head out the door, your mind yells at you to stop and go back.

The Skill Of Courage

 

Your body cries

When you finally get to the gym, your body cries at your first steps on the treadmill, at the first revolution of the bike pedals or the first repetition with a weight. Within minutes you’re exhausted.

You are sweating, gasping for air and your face is turning red.

I understand, trust me. Attempting to get in shape is such a massive challenge because every single exercise is so bloody hard when you are first starting.
Do you know what I find the hardest?

Knowing that I used to be able to lift that weight with ease, run on that treadmill for miles and hold that plank for more than 10 seconds without my core
begging me to stop.

Each one of us can recall a time when these exercises didn’t feel as painful. A time when we were in better shape because we were consistent with our exercise habit.

The Skill Of Courage image 1

 

The good news

The good news I want you to focus on is that whatever your level of fitness, you can get stronger through regular workouts.

The skill of courage is just like your physical muscles. It will only improve through practice, through exercising it.

It is not a trait that some people are born with and if you not, then you will never have it.

I think of courage as the ability to take action in the face of fear, self-doubt, uncertainty, and overthinking.

Courage is is an ability just like lifting a heavy dumbbell to exercise your bicep is an ability. You increase your strength by pushing yourself, and you grow your courage through consistent acts of
courage.

At first, it is hard to take that step and perform a courageous action. It is just like that first day back at the gym.

 

Flex your courage muscle

As you push yourself to exercise your courage muscle, a peculiar thing happens. Every time you flex your courage muscle, then taking courageous action becomes that much easier.

Each and every time you push yourself to step outside your comfort zone, to speak up for your needs, to take on the challenge in front of you, then you complete a courage work out.

Consistent courage workouts lead to a strong courage muscle, and that is when being courageous becomes a habit.

In those moments, when you face up to fear, hesitation, and self-doubt, you can push past those feelings with these.

When your courage muscle is strong, you control your emotions rather than your feelings controlling you.

When you hit the gym consistently for a few weeks, you get stronger and exercising becomes to feel automatic.

Unsurprisingly, your courage muscle works in precisely the same way.

The Skill Of Courage image 3

 

Your muscles atrophy

When you stop exercising them, your muscles will waste away. Your physical and courage muscles will atrophy.

There are health professionals upon and down the country, recommending daily exercise for your health.

And I agree. I also recommend exercising your courage muscle too.

It is in those moments when you push through hesitation by taking courageous action that you can change your life.

When you take control of a challenging situation with an act of courage, you refuse to default to fear any more.

In moments of hesitation, those times when feelings of doubt and fear and worry creep in, you have a critical opportunity.

It is an opportunity for you to practice an act of everyday courage.

Where once you needed to push yourself to overcome hesitation, you will now find it to be second nature to you to push past those barriers with courage.

Are you ready to push past your feelings of doubt, fear, and worry and practice an act of everyday courage so you can live an outstanding life?

  • 7 October, 2019
  • Personal Development, Professional Development
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